B O B (Best of the Best)

B O B 

I recently put my dad to sleep.
His face seemed like he had angelic thoughts. He sleeps. 
I choose to believe that he made peace with the fact that he'd be waiting for us. 
By his holy throne he'll be waiting for us. With wings spread. 
Joel 2:13 said, 
let your broken heart show your sorrow; tearing your clothes is not enough.

My heart seems heavy these days, 
the air around me seems harder to take in. I'm hurt. 
The tears in my eyes as evident as the sun's deeming rays before the rains. 
Before the dark clouds begin to pour, 
before the pieces of my heart starts to break again, 
the pieces flow in this shallow pool of the memories I've lost.
Matthew 5:11 reminds me that happy are those who mourn; God will comfort them. 
He is counting the number of stars; all of them he calls by their names, psalm 147:4. 
My heart weaves a pain not felt by most, 
labelled "move on", 
and of course it didn't fit.
Didn't sit right on my thoughts. 
Like everything felt could suddenly be forgotten.

The voice in my head says the path ahead was made for you,
with love, 
pick up your broken pieces and make art with all of it. 
The pain inside, 
the tears now dried, 
make beautiful art with all that remains. 
And smile, 
because he would have loved that right now. 
Would have loved to be the sun to brighten up the days, 
of everyone he loved. 
To be the best of the best,
never minding which day was his last. 
Never minding which last thoughts of him we'd keep alive in our minds, 
but it didn't matter because this man, 
he always smiled. 
Always wanted to be the joy in our not so perfect lives. 
The calming voice when our lives felt like the skin break by cuts made by knives held by lonely hands. He thrived.
Made me the man I am/ hope to be right now. 
He saw me. 
The race paved by him, 
but also, left for me. 
And grow, 
and keep the flowers in my mind mind fresh for him, 
and grow. 
Like I always did, Amen.


R.I.P

09/05/2019 ✅

Comments

Good reads