Antebellum
Antebellum
I'd fall asleep again,
calmly listening to the night pass away,
my thoughts trickle down my body as each second counts down,
I'd feel the cold besides me and miss the moments of us laying in peace, happy and warm, romantic too,
if only you'd stayed.
The veins in my brittle hands, pathways dark,
a place were once warmth flowed.
Where a high was felt,
in every joint, we'd let those moments take hold,
in our weakest state, slowly melt into each others wants. Everyday.
You said you believed in a flat earth,
said you felt closer to its edge,
that the tipping point was close, that your tipping point was me.
Here, a sea of sad memories,
whose own past was a shadow made real,
made into promise, unfulfilled, regret,
whose steps didn't lead me home.
She a forgotten house, atop a hill I'd been to too many times before,
seem unfamiliar, fading like our I love yous did, or felt.
Ours a passionate wait,
for love,
for fulfillment, satisfaction, desire,
Ours an empty cup never touched.
Teary eyed days no different when it rains,
sound like whispers searching for a host,
for someone to say things we couldn't say.
And naked walk calmly in to raging fires,
take each burn like a compliment,
feel our shared words tattooed in my bared flesh,
Her eyes see the burns feel nothing more than the thought of everything I'd deserved once, to many times before.
This hurt, like most days didn't exist,
like ours was just myth,
a ruined ship washed upon an abandoned shore,
forgotten,
each moment our love felt like a burden between us each time I felt myself the entire village looking down on our broken love.
Looking down on what we thought we had.
looking down on what is clear now was mostly myth.
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